Who would of thought that Fat Albert was even capable of hurting another human being. I mean, stomping on a defenseless player on the ground is no biggie, and tailgating a driver in Fairfax only to get out of the car and hit him at a stop is harmless. Though unlikely, hopefully this punch cost fatty a big loot and puts him behind bars for some time. Anyways, we are all wondering what exactly took place Wednesday morning, and we here at Pessimistic in the District figured this would be the most likely scenario: (Keep in mind, Albert's agent said the other man instigated confrontation after recognizing him)Fatty: This motherfucker isn't gonna let me in! Fuck! I'm gonna fuck this motherfucker up! (takes a bite of some sort of fast food item) Does this guy know who I am? Oh thats the way you want it, I'm gonna be up your ass now!
Hero: What is this shithead doing? Ah fuck you! (gives albert the finger)
(The two stop at a red light. Fatty opens his car door, slams it shut, and walks towards man in car; still with fast food item in hand)
Fatty: (Banging vigorously on man's window) Open the fuckin' door! I ain't no slave! I ain't anyones slave! You ain't gonna treat me like no slave!
Hero: What the fuck are you talking about?
Fatty: I said I ain't no slave! I ain't for sale! You know who I am! You won't treat me like no slave and get away with it!
(Man steps out of car)
Hero: Look man, I don' t know who you are, and what you're talkin' about. But you got some fuckin' issues dude.
Fatty: Coward! Say it to my face! Say it to my face! What you gonna say!?
Hero: Alright wackjob, go to hell!
(Fatty punches man in face, walks back to car, drives away)
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